Here is what happened at work today: I left excruciatingly early (2.30) under the very false pretense that I had a haircut appointment. Now I have to spend part of tomorrow getting my hair cut, so that when I go back on Friday I will appear to have some credibility.
I left work so early because J-lee was so unbearable, so loud, so nosy, so relentless in her embodiment of all the qualities I've tried desperately to rid from myself that in a big fit I called bean & did something I never do: ranted at her in Spanish so that no one else around me would know what I was saying.
Here is what I was saying: "��La voy a matar! �Con estas manos la voy a matar!"
& I try hard, here, not to write anything that's just outright mean because I don't want to burn any bridges & how do you ever know really who is reading?, but really.
I am good at my job. I am very, very good at my job. I do not need anyone, least of all anyone with an exaggerated maternal instinct, to stick her nose into my business & hand me pieces of paper or speak up on my behalf when I am asked a question or pick up the file folder I am currently referencing & fold it up, oh especially anyone who is so late to work this morning that I am the one who hurried through my own work (& yes I was late too) so that I could do her work as well, just to avoid keeping the patients waiting.
But oh, deep breath, deep breath.
I have snacks to eat & a novel to read & an evening of syndicated television in front of me, until bean comes home & we eat dinner & watch Law&Order.
Also at work today J-ann said to me, "I just like to listen to you." She said it because I was speaking Spanish to someone on the phone. But this was not when I was ranting to bean. This was a different phone call & it was calm & full of questions about things like drug allergies.
Oh, yes, I just needed to come home & listen to the Smiths.
i decree today that life
is simply taking and not giving
england is mine and it owes me a living
ask me why, and i'll spit in your eye
ask me why, and i'll spit in your eye
[under the iron bridge we kissed]
PS, I was just looking at bean's wishlist on amazon.com, which includes
The Triumph of the Will because if you are a historian & film scholar, you want that kind of thing, but the thing is that instead of citing Leni Riefenstahl as the director, they've cited Adolf Hitler. I shake my head. I shake my head.
