here is what i have decided. i have decided that my hair is not in want of cutting, my hair is
mod.
:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:just before one i had these dreams in which the bridges over the olentangy were all being reconstructed into roller coaster bridges & i was terrified of them. they were white & somehow the river under them became much more like the sea. the whiteness of the bridges made them look like giant alien whale skeletons. i refused to drive over them. the construction crews were still working on the bridges & singing songs as they worked, like the seven dwarfs, or like the men on the train singing in dancer in the dark. the construction crew could walk across water, but it was more like a video game than like jesus.
:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:anyway when i woke up i was disoriented & hoarse. it was one o'clock & bean had the lights on & was sitting up in bed buying her plane tickets for christmas.
:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:the rest of the day proper, after sleeping & waking again, just as disorienting. it started with a thwarted desire to buy a good coffee on my way to work (& why didn't i, anyway?) & progressed to, i don't know, the usual mix of disgruntled patients, the usual not-being-able-to-find-a-quiet-place-to-read-&-catch-my-breath. i did the crossword & forgot the name of hercules's captive, four letters, blank I L blank.
on the way home i took a different bus than usual & so i walked up the alley past the old house. the mailbox was stuffed full & i resisted the urge to step over the little wall there to see if any of the pre-approved credit cards or the household goods catalogs were for me. the sky was blue & emmylou was singing about, of all things, the end of the world, & for some reason all the leaves on that street are still on the trees in lit-up colors.
