it is cold out & the sun is shining (although not for long, it's getting late). pink-lentil soup is simmering on the stove. in twenty minutes i will go to mass & maybe by the time i get home, bean will be awake from her generic-nyquil-induced sleep.
earlier i was full of anger because all my co-workers left early today, most of them unannounced, because it was assumed that i would stay behind to hold down the fort. (most annoying was when this man called to ask what i thought of as a lot of pointless questions. i spent a good thirty minutes on the phone with him, nine or ten of them explaining how menstruation works ["so, what makes the lining expel? does it just do it on its own, or what?"]).
but then there was this hour when the phones didn't ring, & i sat at the desk eating saltines & reading tolkien, & all the anger just left. suddenly things made sense. not because of tolkien, mind you. just because of stillness & of being absolutely the only person at all sitting in that building.
& then it was good to leave, to walk out into the cold air. i like the sky blue like this. i like my winter coat. i like carrying chris's paperback copy of tolkein in my very-large pocket, & i like buying onions & limes & ginger at the co-op.
i like chopping the ginger very precisely with my knife, instead of using the ginger-grater, just this once. i like the smell of the lentil-soup heading over this way. i like the thought of walking down harrison ave toward the church.
tomorrow i want to spend the day in my pyjamas, working with bean on the wedding-book we are making for her brother, who gets hitched next weekend. i want to watch it's a wonderful life which she has never seen. i want to go to the movies (possibly in my pyjamas). when it gets dark i want to drink plenty of tea, & read, & start making christmas presents.
